modern living furniture batley

lee newton: huzzah! trisha hershberger: huzzah? that's like renaissance faire. would you turkey leg it? i didn't turkey leg it. trisha hershberger: oh ,i always turkey leg it. lee newton: you always-- it? i miss turkey. trisha hershberger:do you turkey leg it?

meg turney: uh uh. trisha hershberger: hey, guys! welcome to tabletalk! i'm trisha hershberger. meg turney: i'm meg turney. lee newton: i'm lee newton. we were referencingrenaissance faire meat. society meg turney: just any meat.

trisha hershberger:which is not something that someone put in the bowlvia #tabletalk or subreddit r/sourcefed, but you could. lee newton: yeah. meg turney: you could. lee newton: favoriterenaissance meat. meg turney: allright, @jcoffee64 says, if you were a transformer,what would you transform into? car, jet, animal, et cetera.

trisha hershberger: oh. lee newton: i mean,i know myself, and i'd probably be a couch. meg turney: oh. lee newton: you know, i'm lazy. i'm not going anywhere. trisha hershberger:did you always want to be chairy frompee-wee's playhouse? lee newton: oh, chairy!

i miss pee-wee's playhouse. it was a little creepyand perverse, but no more than anything elseis nowadays, right? meg turney: true. very true. trisha hershberger: well,when you go back and look at half the stuff that wewatched, it's real creepy. meg turney: i know. rocco's modernlife is so creepy.

trisha hershberger:david the gnome is the creepiestof all the creepy. meg turney: aw,i love that show. lee newton: i did, too! meg turney: but it was creepy. trisha hershberger: he, like,gets naked to ride on animals. it's weird. lee newton: the one that stillholds up is fraggle rock. trisha hershberger: yeah.

lee newton: hard. meg turney: but theystill make fraggle rock. they make it now. lee newton: do they really? meg turney: yeah! trisha hershberger:i love fraggle rock. lee newton: what? trisha hershberger: thatwas my phone ring tone like all last year.

[singing fraggle rock theme song] meg turney: oh man. remember eureka's castle? that was a great-- oh,we're going fraggles. lee newton: eureka's castle? meg turney: eureka'scastle was good! lee newton: ididn't ever see it. meg turney: what? with batley?

oh my god. meg turney: andmagellan, the dragon. trisha hershberger:yeah, magellan. lee newton: oh, wait. trisha hershberger:you know the show. think, it's puppets. lee newton: i thinkit was younger. no, it was younger. because i rememberi'd catch onto it.

and they had like a weirdblown-out background, right? it was just like [trills]. meg turney: it was painted. meg turney: it was all painted. lee newton: but itwas really bright. and it was-- i don't know. i remember just catchingthe tail-end of it. trisha hershberger:the elephant show. meg turney: it mighthave been right after--

lee newton: it was like alittle bit after my time, but i still caught it when itwasn't taboo to watch cartoons. trisha hershberger:wasn't the elephant show on right after eureka's castle? meg turney: theskinamarinkidinkidink? trisha hershberger: yeah! [singing the elephant show theme song] trisha hershberger:i loved that show. meg turney: my mom andi still sing that song.

lee newton: i would watchthat in a heartbeat. does anyone have akid i could borrow? because that's the only way. meg turney: i don't needa kid to watch that show. trisha hershberger: i askthat question every day. meg turney: you don't needa kid to watch the show. skinamarinkidinkidink,go, trisha. lee newton: skinamarinkidoo. trisha hershberger: oh, wegotta answer transformers.

what would you transform into? lee newton: lazy couch! i'm a couch! meg turney: can itransform into a gundam? because i'd just likego from one giant robot into another giant robot. trisha hershberger: speakingof that, show off your mug! meg turney: oh yeah! look, check out my newgundam mug, you guys!

trisha hershberger: pretty cool. lee newton: gundam mug! meg turney: this super sweetguy named frank ware sent it in. all the way fromjapan, from akihabara. trisha hershberger: yay! meg turney: and that'swhy it's so small. because it's from japan. trisha hershberger:they drink less than we large american people do.

lee newton: it really is. it could fit inside him. trisha hershberger: andi have a small mug today, i would consider, andit's still much larger. lee newton: i feelgreat in it, though. i feel normal. meg turney: yeah, you feel likea regular human being in it. trisha hershberger: becausewe're all tiny people. it's a tiny mug for tiny people.

meg turney: what wouldyou transform into? trisha hershberger: i mean,they said jet, car, or anything. meg turney: animal. lee newton: did theygive you options? trisha hershberger: i wouldn'ttransform into an animal. lee newton: no. why would you? trisha hershberger: no. meg turney: yeah,you hate animals!

lee newton: you wantthe power of speech. trisha hershberger:a jet is way cooler. i think probably a jet. because then i could fly. i could get places really fast. i could shoot stuff withlike huge explosives. meg turney: can i transforminto wonder woman's jet? lee newton: becomeinvisible? [laughing] trisha hershberger:that's cool, too.

lee newton: you guysstill depend on fuel. i'm just letting you know. couch? comfy. trisha hershberger: whatif i'm a solar-powered jet? meg turney: youcan't go anywhere! trisha hershberger:solar powered! i mean, i can't flyin the rain, but-- meg turney: you wouldstore the energy.

lee newton: and therewould come a cloud burst, and you're fucked. trisha hershberger: andyou're like, oh shit! meg turney: that's not how solarpower works, trisha hershturd. trisha hershberger: iknow, trust me, yes. it charges thelithium ion battery, which then laststhrough-- i understand. lee newton: no, i reallywant to see trisha do a keynote on solarpower and just be like--

meg turney: if it'sbrainy, it doesn't work. lee newton: solar power. meg turney: it doesn't work. lee newton: the sun. we all love it. trisha hershberger: how about ijust build the jet out of wax? lee newton: perfect. trisha hershberger:so as long as i don't fly too close to the sun.

yeah, you're icarus. trisha hershberger: exactly. i've learned that lesson. that's fine. all right, here we go. meg turney: you'velearned it like you had your wax wings melted. trisha hershberger: i did, idid and it was a long fall. [laughing]

trisha hershberger:henry @imabeliever513 says '90s rap #tabletalk. meg turney: oh my god, yes! i listened totupac this morning. lee newton: this morning! meg turney: how do you want it? lee newton: he's stillalive, everybody. he's still alive. i was actually saying earlierthat sir mix-a-lot probably

did the most for body femaleissues out of any rapper out there. meg turney: can you name oneother sir mix-a-lot song? lee newton: no! i don't think i need to. because, again, i would say-- trisha hershberger: that'sthe song you're referring to. meg turney: yeah,i'm just saying. lee newton: honestly, as ayoung girl, 36-24-36, yeah,

if you're 5'3". i think that's hilarious. meg turney: yeah. lee newton: i was like, thanks. like, thank you, sir mix-a-lot. thanks a lot, because(whining) thanks. trisha hershberger: andi gotta say, what is it? 36-24-36 if you're 5'3"? whoa.

i can't even imagine whatthat would like, for real. meg turney: here's the thing. trisha hershberger:because you'd probably die if those wereyour measurements. lee newton: your organs. your poor, precious-- meg turney: it just made merealize how pear-shaped i was. trisha hershberger: oh, yeah. meg turney: because it'slike, i had 36 on the bottom,

but not up top. lee newton: no, buthe did a great job. thank you, feministsir mix-a-lot. meg turney: whatabout other '90s rap? anyone else? you don't really like rap. trisha hershberger: yeah,i never got into rap music because i couldn'tunderstand it. lee newton: i thoughtyou were going

to say your parentswouldn't have. [interposing voices] trisha hershberger: ifi can't understand it-- trisha hershberger:especially '90s rap. trisha hershberger: ok, give mesome examples of '90s rap then. help me out here. meg turney: tupac was afantastic example of '90s rap. trisha hershberger:what did tupac do? meg turney: look atmy eyes right now.

i will take you in my carand we will have a session. trisha hershberger: idon't want this session. lee newton (singing):california love. meg turney: that'shim and dr. dre. trisha hershberger:the only lyrics i really understood in thatsong were "california love." meg turney: yes, youcan understand it! trisha hershberger: i have aproblem in my brain, i think. lee newton: poor trisha.

i'm sorry, i don'tspeak spanish. trisha hershberger: that'shonestly how i feel. meg turney: no hablo rap game. i don't get that. trisha hershberger:that's how i feel! lee newton: that's ok. meg turney: remember when we didthe political commercial where we pretended to be white ladies? that's trisha.

she's like, i don'tknow what this is. lee newton: i'm sorry. trisha hershberger: i grewup in farmland, pennsylvania. we don't have exciting,hip things there. i can texas two step betterthan most of y'all out there. meg turney: oh my god, really? trisha hershberger: yes! meg turney: because i can, too! meg turney: let's do it.

trisha hershberger: see,that's what i'm saying. i'm open to it,though, so teach me in your '90s rap ways, ladies. meg turney: we'll teach you. lee newton: i'm ok with nottea-- you're not missing out. trisha hershberger: youthink i am missing out. meg turney: but i love '90smusic, like ace of bass. meg turney: real mccoy. lee newton: that was myfirst cd and i wore that out.

meg turney: k-ci and jojo. lee newton (singing):all my life. meg turney: i go thatlast week on my ipod. meg turney: iremember that song. meg turney: that'sk-ci and jojo. lee newton: i rememberit because they did this constantly. meg turney: that's r&b.you like r&b, though. like, boys ii men,you would like.

trisha hershberger: see, ithink i could be ok with that. anything that sounds like icould be saying mean things and i'm talking really fast. meg turney: no snoop dogg? no coolio? no nwa? take it all the way back? take a fantastic voyage? lee newton: you'rea real badass, too.

i feel like it would probablybe an anthem for you. trisha hershberger: youthink all of a sudden i'm going to becomethis rapper who's walking around the office. yeah, 100%. lee newton: all right. trisha hershberger: iwish i liked it, yeah. i don't know. lee newton: whatdo you guys think

is the best tv show of all time? meg turney: ooh, of all time? lee newton: that'sreally difficult. meg turney: game of thrones. trisha hershberger: : no. trisha hershberger:it's good, though. meg turney: i really like it. lee newton: it's great. trisha hershberger:i don't know.

of all time? lee newton: of all time. trisha hershberger: i'mgoing to have to go-- and i'm gonna getcrapped on for this-- i'm gonna have to gobuffy the vampire slayer. meg turney: really? lee newton: oh. trisha hershberger:because it is the only show i could literally sitdown 48 hours at a time

and just watch straight through. and i'd be fine not eatingor sleeping or anything because i'm justin my buffy bliss. meg turney: i will say this. i know i'm going to get morecrap than you over buffy because people do like buffy,friends is an infallible show. friends-- lee newton: she's right. meg turney: i gotthe season dvds,

and while i was makingmy costumes for comic con last year, all i did waswatch season 1 episodes. trisha hershberger: thatshow hasn't aged at all. lee newton: no, that'swhat i'm saying. it's hilarious. well, and i think you'regoing to have to go, like, what are theimplications of all time? like, are we going integrity? are we going, like, youknow, how the long lasting?

what's in syndication? are we going storyline? plot line? are we going best finale? are we going-- youknow what i mean? meg turney: don'tover-think it, spaz. what do you think yourfavorite show of all time is? lee newton: seinfeld. fucking seinfeld.

it's really good writing. meg turney: we wouldmake a great evening block of television. lee newton: yes. friends and seinfeld. trisha hershberger: and buffy! no? is that not inthe evening plans? meg turney: no.

lee newton: i was intobuffy, but again, i understand that my mother waslost when it came to buffy. lee newton: hold on, wait. so, what? you know, like she didn'tsit down and watch that. meg turney: i do knowonce more with feeling. i've seen a few select episodes. trisha hershberger: my historyteacher, who was also my debate coach, was way intobuffy and i remember

calling her, like, crying,and she was crying. we're like, (fake sobbing) andthen angel just (fake sobbing). oh my god. that was my highschool experience. meg turney: did buffy die? did she die? lee newton: turney, did youever call your history teacher? meg turney: yeah, no. i do feel like i did havean english professor that i

thought was cute, buti never called her. lee newton: really? i had an english professorthat i thought was cute, too. meg turney: meow! lee newton: mr. williams,he looked like don draper. meg turney: no, we talked aboutmr. williams was my history professor that ithought was cute. lee newton: ooh, don draper. trisha hershberger:it's a hot teacher day.

mr. williams. meg turney:@philliphatcher says where do you think the us willbe in 10 or 20 years' time, economically, culturally,and any other way? i think we're going to be-- lee newton: to be honest, 10 to20 years isn't, like, massive. meg turney: space cars! trisha hershberger: youwant stuff to change. lee newton: yeah, i wantspace cars for sure.

meg turney: space cars for sure. lee newton: um, i dunno. i think we're pushingmore towards, like, actually labeling gmostuff, so economically that will change stuff. trisha hershberger: maybewe'll be a little healthier. trisha hershberger: maybe peoplewill have health insurance. lee newton: thatwould also be amazing. meg turney: thatwould be really nice.

trisha hershberger:that would be nice, too. lee newton: thatwould be amazing. trisha hershberger:uh, small steps, kids. meg turney: maybe we'll bewearing nehru-necked shirts. meg turney: tunics withnehru necks, anybody? trisha hershberger: maybewe'll get to have sex the way that the cone headsdo with the rings. meg turney: you reallydon't want to touch people. like, you just--

trisha hershberger:oh, that's not true. that is not true. lee newton: no, dude. lee newton: that is not true. this one has a journal. it is not true. meg turney: this onedoesn't have a journal. lee newton: she wants to touch. she wants to touch.

she also wants to explorethe cone head way of sex. trisha hershberger: i do. i think the more ways ofsex, the merrier. [laughing] i just said that, yup. lee newton: that's the newbiography title now. [laughing] meg turney: hey, mrs.hershberger, how you doing? you gonna call trisha now? trisha hershberger: ohno, don't talk to my mom! hi, mom.

lee newton: mmm, yeah. female speaker: she's watching. trisha hershberger: allright, one quick one. let's do it real fast, guys. um, keola ceridon says,ever been in a fist fight? #tabletalk, go! i haven't. but the only time that i almostwas, there was this crazy girl named tiffany vasquez--you know who you are.

anyways, she fought everyone. she was that girl that-- why,why do you fight everyone? she also always wouldbare her midriff and it wasn't a good idea. and so she would literally--one day she decided to come up and she was like, i'mgoing to fight lee. no freaking clue why. i have no idea why. the good news about it isthat someone else behind me

was like, you're notgoing to fight lee. i'm gonna fight youif you fight lee. and she was huge. meg turney: wow. lee newton: and like, inever got in a fist fight, but the one time i almost did,this girl jillian was like, uh uh, let's go. and i was like, oh! like, i had a hugefriend for a day.

lee newton: jillianwas not my friend. she wasn't my friend. but for that day-- trisha hershberger:for that day, jillian was your good friend. meg turney: best friend. no, i've never been in afist fight, but i love ufc, and i know how to use12-6 elbows, which are illegal in the atian butnot the real world, right?

and how to put people inarm bar and an ankle lock, so fucking bring it! i will smash your face in! trisha hershberger: yougotta be careful with that because i almost gotinto a fist fight with this kid that was mean tomy friend when i was younger. i was like, i don'tknow, maybe 10, 11. almost got into a fight withmy friend, hurt her feelings, made her cry.

i was pissed. and so i thought, i'vewatched enough cartoons. i've watched enough fighting. i'm going to bereal good at this. meg turney: there's a differencebetween cartoons and men actually fighting. trisha hershberger:see, no, no, no. you think you know your haiyahsand your-- you think you know. meg turney: i would say--i see the face shake.

i would say i've actuallydone the here's how i actually put your arm in an arm bar. trisha hershberger: ok,so you've practiced. yeah, i just thought i was-- lee newton: what's an arm bar? meg turney: it's where you haveyour legs spread across them and you pull theirarm back and it'll break your-- i can't do it. you have to belaying on the ground.

trisha hershberger:no, no, no, no, no. please, not hurting here. please, no hurting here. trisha hershberger: but no, iwas trying to be all defendy and i thought i haddone enough research in my extensivecartoon watching. it was a boy. and i went up to this boy. lee newton: oh, hershberger!

trisha hershberger: hemade my female friend cry! that is not cool, stupid boy! and so, yeah, i went up tohim and i tried to fight him. and it didn't workout very well for me. meg turney: i can justsee baby hershberger. lee newton: squee, squee! trisha hershberger: it didn'thelp that i was like a foot shorter thaneverybody else my age. so i probably came up here.

and i was like,i'm gonna get you! i know. and i think i tried to likespin-kick him and i might have even said haiyah. and what ended up happeningwas he grabbed my foot and like spun it, so i endedup just falling on the ground, and then i was crying too. lee newton: hold on. trisha hershberger:it was horrible.

lee newton: hewalker-texas-rangered you. trisha hershberger: it sucked! i tried to spin-kickhim, which is way cooler. meg turney: trisha,you know how i can't watch showsthat are awkward? i can't even hear that storybecause it's so awkward, it makes me feelbad on my insides. trisha hershberger: i triedto double-dragon-kick him and it didn't work.

lee newton: oh, it'sall coming back, guys. meg turney: you didremind me, though. in sixth grade, i didsee a friend of mine. my best friend was, like,wrestling with this guy and i thought theywere fighting, and he was down on the groundso i kicked him in the ear. and then they were playfighting and i didn't know. but then we dated for likefour years after that. and that's how we met.

trisha hershberger:there you have it! kick him in the ear, ladies! that's how you get a good man. well, no. go to get pho by yourself. and then kick him in the ear. meg turney: some guys like that. trisha hershberger:it's perfect! meg turney: well, thanksfor joining us on tabletalk.

keep sending in your topics.#tabletalk, r/sourcefed, and make sure to like andsubscribe because it really helps the channel. lee newton: yay! trisha hershberger:i'm trisha hershberger. meg turney: i just reallyfeel like some guys like being kicked in the ear.

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